Before Midnight

Usually when the director happens to be one of the writers too, you can expect such heights of boredom and nonstop drivel. Don't get me wrong, I like this genre which I call 'yappy dee yap' movies. Movies which are about lengthy blabber, random tantrums and pointless conversations. Movies with no backbone except for chit chat. I loved the following: "Before Sunset" which seemed to have a point or driving towards one. The excellent "2 Days in Paris" and its inferior sequel "2 Days in New York." Woody Allen's "Midnight in Paris." "The Trip (2010)" with British comedians Steve Coogan and Rob Brydon. But "Before Midnight" is just too much. Every 3 minutes I felt like screaming "Will you please SHUT UP!" This is not a good sign. It reminded me of young me being stuck at the dinner table with boring self-castrated adults. Every now and then my imagination worked on how the movie would greatly improve if a tractor rammed into the (cliché cute) twins or if the roof collapsed on the old people at the lunch table. How about if the couple brought varying degree of bad luck everywhere they went but they didn't know it was their fault until it struck midnight and a giant meteor fell on their head? That alone would have kept my interest up instead of downward sloping. I think the yapping was way over the top this time and nothing really happened in the movie. It's crossed the line of truly annoying and irritating. Even the * topless scene was too much and disconnected with the rest. I cannot connect with the characters, their life or the story. If that couple were my friends, I would never invite over and permanently hide their status updates on social networks.

(I'm not sure I give any spoilers in this review, so I checked the alert button anyways) It is utterly incomprehensible to me how this movie has received such positive reviews here. The first two movies in this series were so charming and enjoyable. Getting through this one though was a tough, tough slog. There are no redeeming qualities whatsoever to either Jesse or Celine. Indeed, most of the movie is a case study in passive-aggressive behaviour - awash in bitterness, regrets and jealousies. The acting wasn't bad at all, but it is beyond anybody's talent to make these people seem even remotely interesting or enjoyable. Who wants to watch such a banal, petty, dysfunctional relationship where absurd arguments meander on and on ad nauseam? I kept fast forwarding in the hopes of finding a better movie - but, not to be. Why would the writers do such a disservice to the beautiful Celine in this third movie? They made her into an insufferable,sour, foul-mouthed, bitch. (sigh)