House of Fallen

For the first 20 minutes, I paid attention and tried to follow along. Figuring out how the different groups of people are related, what is going on, who the good and bad guys are, and why I should care made my head hurt. Then, about 30 to 40 minutes in, I stopped trying to pretend to care and started to get drowsy. Only because I pulled up a game to play to engage my brain was I able to wake up and bit. Instead of watching, which isn't really necessary to kind of follow the weak plot, I just listed to the dialogue and foley track while continuing to play games. When fights and drama arose, I alt+tabbed back over to watch the brief action sequences. I still have no idea what the point of this movie was. It was so utterly plain and bland that I just couldn't get into it. I never once felt scared, threatened, or even weirded out. I want the last 95 minutes of my life back.

"You can either continue the path your on, praying for those beyond help, or you can join me. I will teach you how to hunt and kill a fallen angel." After the floods were started in order to wash away evil, a few "Watchers" survived. These watchers find past sinners and punish them. It is up to a select twelve to find and kill them before it's too late. This is a movie that after reading what it was about made me excited. Fallen angels, battle, religion..."Constantine 2???" About 15 min in you realize that just because it sounds good on paper doesn't always mean anything. To be fair, this movie was not that bad overall. The best way to describe it would be that the movie felt like the re-enactment scenes for shows like "Unsolved Mysteries" and the talking parts in documentaries where the subject is in a chair and looking at the camera. If you go in expecting a lot you will be disappointed. Overall, not that exciting but watchable. I would call it a religious horror movie. I give it a C-. Would I watch again? - No, barely made it through once. *Also try - Constantine

You know when a dire introductory scene is followed by some 'I've found a suitable special effect' opening titles that the film is going to reek. There's a failsafe plot from the religion/occultism barrel and, as always seems to be the case, a strong title and well worded blurb promises a decent film, perhaps along on the lines of Constantine. Sadly the whole premise of angels and demons and other worldiness is utterly lost in what I presume to be a "relationships and how they change under odd circumstances" film. Some pretty dire dialogue (and there isn't much else of note in the production) has that off-putting whiff of looked-good-on-paper. Don't be expecting any exciting imagery or scenes, the angels shop at K-Mart and live in condos. Oddly there are a few seasoned hams in this film but they only serve to emphasise other inadequacies in the production. In some scenes you can almost see them 'thrash in the water' to sustain their personal credibility as actors. Pretty dire throughout.

For the first 20 minutes, I paid attention and tried to follow along. Figuring out how the different groups of people are related, what is going on, who the good and bad guys are, and why I should care made my head hurt. Then, about 30 to 40 minutes in, I stopped trying to pretend to care and started to get drowsy. Only because I pulled up a game to play to engage my brain was I able to wake up and bit. Instead of watching, which isn't really necessary to kind of follow the weak plot, I just listed to the dialogue and foley track while continuing to play games. When fights and drama arose, I alt+tabbed back over to watch the brief action sequences. I still have no idea what the point of this movie was. It was so utterly plain and bland that I just couldn't get into it. I never once felt scared, threatened, or even weirded out. I want the last 95 minutes of my life back.