Black Samurai

This movie is a forgettable karate flick starring the wonderful Jim Kelly. Every karate movie cliche is here, including midgets, and an evil white guy karate master (who doesn't know karate) with a vulture named "Voltan." STANDOUT SCENE - Watch closely when the evil white guy sends his vulture to attack Kelly. Quote, "Voltan! Kill!!" (never mind that vultures are lazy creatures by nature who wouldn't even eat a dead deer if they had to cross the street to get it). Okay, now watch when Voltan lands on Jim Kelly -- Kelly's stunt-double is a white guy. A blonde white guy - they didn't even give the double a dark haired wig or anything. Other standouts include Kelly's staff fight with a group of thugs, and his pre-final showdown with a Damon Wayans lookalike, where Kelly spouts Muhammad Ali like banter ("C'mon chump! C'mon sissy!") A great movie if you can a) find it and b) stay awake through it!!

Al Adamson had little luck mastering the horror genre and it would appear from this misbegotten, Jim Kelly vehicle that his gleeful ineptitude as a director was at its zenith with 'Black Samurai'. If they haven't benumbed themselves already, bad movie aficionados will find themselves in a terminal state of physical and spiritual paralysis mid-way through a screening of this confounding example of horribly inept and sickeningly opportunistic "cinenema". It's such a shame that the name of Ed Wood gets bandied around as filmdom's most foolhardy auteur, when a myopic, amputee, feral child could have edited 'Black Samurai' with more panache than Adamson; you could gaffer tape a Bolex into the hand of a 30 year old corpse and engender a more profound cinematic statement than 'Black Samurai'. If one had the choice of ramming a frozen stoat repeatedly into both eyes, or watch 'Black Samurai'; find yourself an icy mammal, as I can assure you the latter is infinitely more painful.

This is quite literally the funniest thing I've ever seen ever. I almost suffocated myself with laughter three times during this film, and me and my friends still yell out the word Jetpack for no apparent reason in response to the utter hilarity that is Black Samurai. This movie makes about as much sense as a Schizophrenic on Acid. If anyone can explain to me what the hell was up with the cavemen lead by a cowboy midget, I would be willing to pay handsomely. And why is that * taking off the same piece of clothing for about 15 minutes? Did the director really think that they could get away with just looping a scene 10-12 times in lieu of actually shooting? But seriously... This is a great movie to watch in the middle of the night, drunk or high, preferably with six or seven of your good humored (And by good humored, I mean Mystery Science Theater fans) friends. Be prepared for what has to be the most non-sensical thing ever created by man. Enjoy.

OK, if we've seen "Enter the Dragon" and "Black Belt Jones", then we should know not to expect any kind of life-changing experience from watching a Jim Kelly movie, just to enjoy it. And with "Black Samurai", you'd better believe that you will! Kelly plays D.R.A.G.O.N. agent Robert Sand, who one day learns that his hubby has been kidnapped by a crime syndicate. From there, the movie is basically a series of ass-kicking scenes, no matter how unrealistic. And no great acting either. It's obviously an excuse for him to buck The Man's mores...which he does perfectly. I should identify that if you're expecting a repeat of "Enter the Dragon", you'll be disappointed. Jim Kelly is NOT graceful like Bruce Lee was. I think that his main asset is his cool Afro. If you expect nothing more from this movie than the sort of kick-ass fun characteristic of blaxploitation movies, you won't be the least bit disappointed. It's the sort of movie that really makes one idolize the '70s.

Strictly for comedy relief , this film is so bad its hysterical .Jim Kelly is a terrible actor and OK we knew that . but I thought he was a decent karate man . However the fighting in this film is comical , the overdubbing is of the quality of an Asian kung fu flick and the plot GEEZ !!! Janicot the warlock is trying to take over the world I think and he has the midget kung fu men to do the job !! However there is one man who can stop him , he's that agent of D.R.A.G.O.N. which stands for defense something something ... Yes thats how realistic it is , the realism is gripping and ...I'm kidding , actually its good fun because they really seem to take this somewhat seriously .If bad/good is your bag , its right here in abundance .

The movie "The Black Samurai" has everything you could ever want in a film: kung-fu, midgets, a mariachi band, a vulture, a jet-pack, a sassy black woman, cool sound effects, a car-chase, and random explosions. PLUS: A gay devil-worshiping badguy, a secret agent organization, a fire-spouting pen, snakes, afros, a scene where the good guy kills tons of badguys with a grenade because he's tired...and with SEX APPEAL! The only thing lacking in this movie is gratuitous gore and nudity! Wow what a feature!